Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Breakdown in the Outback

Chris and I went to Casper, WY this week.  Why Casper, you ask.  I'll tell you why.  Chris had an interview at Casper College since his contract with BYU ends this summer.  Something I need to preface before I share my story.....growing up, I lived very close to the Wyoming border and that was close enough for me.  I pledged to NEVER live in Wyoming under any circumstances.

Well, my situation since high school has changed somewhat.  My family needs income.  State school in Utah aren't hiring due to budget issues.  BYU (and all other LDS employment) has had a hiring freeze for the past year.  That doesn't bode well with us.  So Chris has applied to several schools outside the area and Casper is the one that called back.  I decided...hmmmm....maybe Wyoming isn't so bad afterall.

On our final evening in Casper, Chris and I went to Outback.  We hadn't been there in years and thought that as long as Casper was reimbursing us, we might as well go to places we don't normally go (it's above our usual eating out budget).  After being lost for quite some time and being able to explore the city via car, we called Outback and they directed us to their location.  The waitress sat us down at our corner booth.  There were cowboys seated directly behind me, and to our side, several couples sat.  The cowboys were engineers from an oil company.  The couples to our side....well...they are what lead me to my breakdown.  I couldn't help but eavesdrop on their conversation.  They were loud.  They talked mostly of an upcoming wedding.  "Who's going to give her away."  "Her father, I think."  "I hope so."  They talked of the bachelorette party and of calling in sick for work due to hangovers.  One asked, "Who's going to watch your trailer?"  All the while, I was thinking, "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"  Was there anyone in this town I would be able to relate to?  Were there any Moms out there in healthy marriages with children as lovely as mine (okay, that's impossible)?  Would I be moving to Casper, away from my family, away from friends, and away from all that I knew to a place I swore never to go?!!  The tears slowing slipped out from my eyes.  Chris caught me wiping one of those tears off my cheeks and then I was a goner.  The faucet had been turned on.  I did pretty good keeping it under control, but more than once, I did the cryer's sucking of air hiccup  thing.  Good thing the music was loud.  I feel like I need to tell you that Casper is in fact  a very nice city with no unsafe neighborhoods and greats shops and a number of recreational activities available.  To tell you the truth, I think I was just missing my children desperately and feeling super homesick.  I know that if I have my little family with me, I'll be fine wherever we go.  And, yes!  I would still move to Wyoming.  I think it would be great to get out of my comfort zone.  Back when I was in high school, I didn't have a husband and kids who would follow me wherever I went.  I could go anywhere...as long as they were with me. 

15 comments:

  1. Here's another measure: There are three bookstores in Casper that belong to the Mountains and Plains Independent Booksellers Association (we used to belong when we had a bookstore in Springville--I remember meeting Casper booksellers at the meetings). That may not sound like much, but in this day and age it's a huge deal when a community supports even one independent bookseller, never mind three! If you end up there, I'll bet you'll find all sorts of unexpected souls.

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  2. It's hard to see families when you are missing yours.
    I'm sure you will find friends to help with the transition.

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  3. Oh Lyndee! I'd have been sobbing with you. I don't like change. I'm not good at it at all and moving would be so hard! Keep us posted and God bless you and your family!

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  4. P.S. Misty woud be a good one to talk all this through with......

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  5. Just think of your beautiful son who wants to be a cowboy! Wyoming will be an adventure for all of you and a dream come true for that Shem:) Your already amazing in my eyes for all your moves....what's one more....teheee. Love ya!

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  6. sweetie - you are so right - you have your kiddos there and a home to live in and a job for the family and voila - things will look brighter! honestly - i think you have been through a harder time in the past year than what you will find there - the church members will be your family there - i am very hopeful for that! i hope everything works out beautifully! just hang on darlin', the moving thing can't last forever. what if wyoming is "the place"??? :)

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  7. Wyoming the place? That would just prove that God has a sense of humor. Seriously! I do have a son that gave up his cowboy stuff after we moved here. Maybe he'll pull it all out again. He sure did make a cute cowboy one day, soldier the next.

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  8. Lyndee, take it from me, change is hard especially when you have a family. But, you have it right. As long as you have your husband and kids, you can go anywhere and be ok. The change would be nice. It has been good for our kids to live different places. Keep us posted! :)

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  9. I am so sorry that you have to enter the unknown and scary. I am sure from your positive attitude that you will take something positive from the situation should you have to pursue it. A job is good right!? I only wish it were in VT!

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  10. Lauren,

    You need to get the good people of Vermont to hire full-time community college faculty. They only use part-time teachers at the community colleges.

    Lyndee and I also wish it was in Vermont. I am not sure if my mother-in-law Sandy would like us going all the way to New England, though.

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  11. Margy--I can't wait to check out those book stores! My 10-yr-old has his birthday a couple days ago and the activity he chose to do: go to Barnes and Noble. Chris LOVED that idea. Course, it was Toys R Us after that. I'll have to do some research on the things that Casper has to offer. We'll be heading there the beginning of August, so I've got a little time.

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  12. I saw them at the book store!!! It was fun to see them.

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  13. I'll see what I can do about that Chris. For now work your way up that ladder. Maybe we can work on a summer home or something.

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  14. I grew up in Cody, Wyoming. It was a lovely place to grow up as a kid. The only thing I didn't like, especially as a teenager, was the too small town feel of things. But Casper is larger than Cody, so you'll be fine. Good luck!

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  15. Tiffany, I grew up in very rural and loved it so don't know what my aversion to Wyoming stems from. Well, that's not entirely true. I was very...preppyish and didn't have a cowgirl bone in me (though, I could ride horses and do hard work just fine). I am actually looking forward to going to a smaller city again. It really is beautiful there and has lots of good stuff to offer. I know I can make friends there, if I open myself up to it. Thanks for your comment!

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