Thursday, May 13, 2010

Insight into my Insanity

I lost my keys.  Well, I'd thought I'd lost my keys.  It started on Monday when I was rounding up all my gear to head to work when I first noticed.  The keys weren't hanging on their peg.  Try my purse.  Empty the purse.  Clean up the emptied purse.  No keys.  Remove all couch cushions.  No keys.  AAaaauuuugggghhhh!  No time.  Have to get to work.  Grab spare keys.

You might think, well, you've got spare keys, so what's your problem?  I had a spare van key.  That would get me to work.  It doesn't lock my house and it doesn't lock up the doors at night when I leave work.  So, I secretly exited out the back sliding glass door (I didn't want any cat burglars seeing their easy entrance).  At work, I had to grovel to borrow someone else's keys.  I hate doing this because then it makes me look unorganized and completely scattered.  I felt unorganized and completely scattered.  Oh, well.  Pride swallowed.

Tuesday:  I again revisit my purse, all couches, under my children's bed, on their beds, under and over and through my bed, in all bookshelves....and anywhere else I could imagine to look.  I even did a little cleaning hoping that would reward me the blessing of keys magically reappearing on the floor I had just picked up.  It never happened.  Day 2 of swallowing my pride at work.  This time, there were questions and little lectures, "There are only 2 places I put my keys....."  Let me just tell you, I had already gone through the wringer of self-loathing, saying...well, screaming to myself.."Why didn't you just hang up your keys where they are supposed to go?!!  NEVER put them down in some random place because you KNOW you are going to lose them!!!"  Yes, I was internally screaming and that can get pretty loud.  I told my husband to offer a $1 reward to whoever could find them.  Todd looked in our van.  I'd already searched our car since that's that last place I remembered having them.  Did I give them to the kids to unlock the door?  Did I set them down somewhere so I could hand sweep the dirt that had fallen out of a mother's day flower pot?  I DON'T REMEMBER?

So, I got home from work feeling dejected.  I was going to have another day of searching for keys and have to report my keys officially gone.  Then, inspiration struck me.  I had unlocked the van to check something.  I mentioned this to Chris and he headed out.  He was gone over 5 minutes.  The van isn't that big.  Not a good sign.  When he came in he said, "It's like checking off another room" (that we had searched thoroughly).  Then I saw him walking down the hall.....with my keys.  The stinker.  After giving him his due lecture, he told me he had found them in the back seat.  Well, I never got in the back seat.  Turns out, Shem wanted to look for something in the van that he had lost.  He grabbed my keys and the rest is history.  Guess what?!!  I'm not crazy.  I'm not unorganized and scattered.  Well...maybe I am, but not this time.  I couldn't wait to get to work and tell them..."See, it wasn't my fault!"  You see, when you're a parent, you always have someone to blame.  I said I wasn't disorganized and scattered.  I never said I was loyal.


  1. Kids are always doing things like that! Glad you found the keys.

  2. HA! Loyalty? Pssshhh, what's that? If you can blame, I say blame girl!!! Especially since it wasn't you.
    Seriously, we aren't is our kids! Interruptions, misplacing things, you name it- it is all their fault. At least, it is what lets me sleep at night.
    Glad you found them!

  3. Last time my keys were lost longer than a couple hours it was because Geneva put them in a rarely opened cabinet. It was a fluke that we found them. There's nothing worse than the feeling of looking for something and not knowing where to look. I may not have been initially insane, but by the time I'm done, insanity is pretty stinkin close.

  4. Years ago while at the fabric store unbeknown to me Trevor had taken my keys and threw them into a bin of fabric. We searched the store up and down and ending up walking home. (me about to deliver Colin, Brennan, and Trevor--which shows you how young the older two were) We walked several miles and I thought I was going to die!

    Several hours later the store called, someone had found them while looking for fabric!

    Gotta love our kids eh?

  5. Teeheee :) Kids.....They really are our pay back!

  6. oh man. you should have offered the standard 20. that get's em' every time. your keys will be found with 5 minutes gar-un-teed!


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