Monday, February 22, 2010

My Bubble

We all have it.  Some people's bubble are more pronounced.  Some...well, okay.  Not everyone has one.  I'm talking that space around you in which no one must infringe.  My Grandma Curtis's is a rather large bubble.  You can just see the uncomfortable tenseness in her face (and feel it in her whole body) as you hug her.  Then there's a cousin I have where everytime I see her (it's been...wow!  5 years) she comes towards you with a full body hug.  That's when I turn into my grandmother.  I hug back..that's the thing you're supposed to do.
You see this box?  Consider it my personal bubble.  When people get closer than that, I feel the muscles in my body start going rigid.  What am I supposed to do?  Do I tactfully back up?  Do I turn my head and pretend to be distracted by a child running down the hall?  Do I pretend that that child is actually mine?  All this is running through my head while none of conversation with my bubble invader is being absorbed. 

Another space invader?  Someone in my yard.  A couple kids were "cutting" through the field across the street to me.  It would cut 10 minutes off their walk to the river.  They were caught by a neighbor who gave them a stern reprimand and those kids sulked away.  Keep in mind, this is an unused field.  Growing up on quite a large range, there were many strangers who desired to "test our waters" or hunt for wild animals (the only thing wild on our property were the kids), or see what was up the mountain.  Anytime someone stepped foot onto our property, I would again feel the muscles in my body start going rigid.  I glued myself to a window, with the phone in my hand, ready to call whatever authorities that could take care of this trespasser. 

Humans are a funny thing.  My husband doesn't quite get my issues.  But, like most animals in the kingdom, we have our territories.  And while I haven't "marked" it so to speak, don't think that my claws won't come out if need be.

9 comments:

  1. "My husband doesn't quite get my issues."

    I think I understand it to a degree. I find your connection between your personal space and your yard space to be very interesting. I really do think there is a oonnection.

    I am glad that you are not going around marking your territory in the traditional sense.

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL! I was TOTALLY just about to write that Chris! At least you aren't peeing around the perimeters....that sort of thing...oh well...he stole my thunder. Guess I'll just say this: I agree!!!!! Keep your hands off my stomach when I am pregnant, keep your animals, your kids, and yourself out of my yard, and for crying out loud...don't let me smell what you ate for lunch on your breath while you talk to me!!! :) Don't be poppin' the bubble...that's all I gotta say!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Understood! Besides a fence I wonder if there is another way to "mark" my territory?

    ReplyDelete
  4. PMC,

    Great minds...well you know the saying.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ha! I can just see Lyndee squatting all over the yard!!! Great visuals!

    Well, I am probably your worst enemy, because I am a space invader. When I talk to someone, greet them, or say goodbye I tend to touch them. A hug, a touch on the arm, or a pat on the back or shoulder; I am just a "touchy" person.
    So warning noted- I will STAY BACK!
    Great post.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Natalie, you're fine. I much more "touchy" than I used to be. I think it's more about the person that has to have a conversation within inches of your face and you wonder where you should be looking...since looking into their eyes feels a bit too intimate, but looking away almost feels like you are dismissing them. I wish I had all the answers.

    ReplyDelete
  7. LOL....How did the two of us ever become friends:) I too will admit that I am a space invador, although I must say that I am usually pretty good at feeling vibes of thoes who dont want to be touched, huged, or loving-lee patted. Another great post!!! Just curious can you see that trate in any of your kids? My middle child and youngest child don't like people invading their space either unless invited and will actaully tell people to back off....that makes for aquward moments at times:)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Melissa--I think you have helped me get over a few of my issues. Besides, friends are different. Friends are allowed in the bubble. Special pass and all. My kids are funny; it depends on the minute if they feel they have space issues. Mostly, I don't think they do. They are CONSTANTLY crowding me and need to be right on top of me....ALL THE TIME!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Funny, I contradicted myself. My kids don't have space issues with me but maybe the occassional bubble with others.

    ReplyDelete

I love hearing from you!